I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
