i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize