i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
