i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
