I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize