His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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