just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Randomize
