i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
50% drunk capacity currently
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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