i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Randomize
