Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
