this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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