She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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