for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
