Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I need water and some morals
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
