You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize