oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
