i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
i out mim tonsoeep
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