You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize