i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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