: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
