so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
