At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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