I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize