Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
