Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
