I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
