Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
they need to just BURY HIM!
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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