Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
