I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
