Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
