i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I fill condoms, not promises.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Randomize
