You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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