I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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