and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Randomize
