I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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