You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
