Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
my mouth tastes like poor choices
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize
