marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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