He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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