Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(760): View more from California

...so i touched it.

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(862): View more from New Jersey

so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?

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(516): View more from New York

Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you

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(956): View more from Texas

It was like little house on the drunk prairie.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time

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(816): View more from Missouri

I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

There are cops on horseback in our back yard

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(250): View more from British Columbia

Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.

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(971): View more from Oregon

I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.

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