Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
