It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
