I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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