I just pynch a tree in the face
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize