On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I just got carded by a ten year old.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
