OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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