Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
