That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
