we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
he's gonorrhea incarnate
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
