i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Randomize
