Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
