My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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